Thriving in Chaos: The Hidden Trauma Behind the Game

As a 15- or 16-year-old athlete growing up in Stockton, California, I was angry. 

What started out as hurt eventually developed into rage—rage fueled by a father I felt was abusive toward me. He was a minister, and I often watched him preach about values I never experienced in our relationship. In truth, it was quite the opposite. 

The physical, verbal, and emotional abuse I endured led me to run away from home—more than once. 

But thank God for the people around me—teachers, coaches, and peers—who were new in my life but gave me the support, comfort, and encouragement I needed to keep going. 

I hated my father. But I found a way to channel that energy into the game I loved. 

The emotions, passion, and fury I brought to the court were fueled by that hate. 

Rather than letting my pain derail me, I used basketball as therapy. And in doing so, I propelled my career forward. 

It took decades to fully understand the impact that trauma had on my life. That understanding marked the beginning of my healing process. 

Too often, all we see in athletes is the physical grace— 

…but beneath it are layers of unattended trauma. 

For many of us, the game has been the only place we could process pain. 

A form of therapy in motion. 

We are not just competing. 

We are thriving in chaos… until we learn to heal. 

~ Coach Delmont